Sunday, February 1, 2009
In my story, I am trying to show that stories aren't always as expected. I think suprising the reader works well in my piece (it goes from a gleeful story about a dog to a murder mystery). I think that i kind of rushed the ending so its lacking essential details. To answer this question would be beneficial; How can i make my ending more convincing and interesting?
Friday, January 30, 2009
The Lumberjack Only Chops Once
We met on the fourth of July, five years ago. She was young at the time, and I fell in love with her big brown eyes and long lashes. Her black, silk-like fur put me in a daze from first sight. Her name was Samantha, Sammy for short. After a few years, I had taught her basic tricks, like sit, lie down, speak, roll over, and paw (which was a handshake). She also knew some more complicated tricks, like retrieving (balls, the morning newspaper, and a soda can), jumping over a stick, jumping into the lake off of a dock for distance, and many more.
After she had deftly retrieved a soda can, Sammy had started becoming extremely active. She would wag her tail vigorously, and leave a bruise on me if her tail hit me. She ran circles around the house, and when I let her outside she would do the same thing. At first I thought she was breaking the soda cans and drinking them, thus getting caffeine in her system. I thought this until one day after circling the house she bolted into the woods in my backyard. She had done this before, and when I called her she usually came back, but this time she didn’t.
I chased her, or rather followed the sound of rustling leaves and broken twigs that I thought was her. I shouted continually in a guttural tone trying to subjugate her, “SAMMY COME! “ My poor neighbors had to listen to these screams, because the eddies were extremely harsh that day. Still, she didn’t come. I headed towards the woods. As I walked through the brush, I could see where her matted down trail meandered to make a labyrinth. Suddenly, I saw her behind an old oak tree. She was sniffing in a covert knot hole in the tree. As I peered around the tree, I saw what she was rubbing her nose against. It was tattered pieces of a mailman’s carrying bag. I pulled out what was left of the bag and shuddered.
The bag was covered with blood. Also in the bag was a letter addressed to me. I panicked and tried to scream, but nothing came out. I was in shock and a bit leery. I grabbed Samantha by the collar and forced her home, as I took the evidence with me. I immediately ran inside to call the cops. An officer on duty answered with a stern voice: “Officer Nuttelman, can I assist you?” I didn’t know what to say at first, I was thwarted. Then I answered, “Yes, I, I…I…found a ripped, blood soaked mailman’s bag in the woods behind my house.”
“Continue, with the story sir.”
“There’s also a letter addressed to me.”
“Did you open the letter sir?”
“Not yet, it’s stained with blood.”
“Don’t open it, we’ll send an officer over who’s trained with this type of case.”
“Ok, I’ll be waiting.”
I waited for what seemed like forever with Sammy at my side. She sensed my fear, as she was trembling with me. The trained officer finally arrived with rubber gloves, a chemical kit, and his normal police gear. He took the letter and opened it carefully. Inside was a letter that was dated 5 years ago before my grandmother had died. It read: Dear Grandson, I know you are an honorable person. I am writing to you to tell you about a shady character in town. He works in the lumberyard with Grandpa. He is known to steal and be violent. Rumor has it, he uses his ax for more than cutting down trees. Please be careful when you are out taking Sammy for her diurnal walks. Good tidings. Love, Grandma. P.S. Don’t tell anyone about this letter. I might be putting you in danger telling you all this.
The officer’s mouth hung open as he read this letter. The officer told that case was analogous to a case that occurred about 5 years ago. The date was the same day marked on the letter. The case involved an old man who was murdered with an identified sharp object near a lumber yard. The killer was never found. Apparently, the old man was on his way to the post office to get a stamp to mail a letter. I pondered this a minute and then said, “Oh my gosh, that was the letter we have here written by my grandmother.” The policeman then told me a mailman was also slain with an identified object around the same time. I thought out loud, “This must be the mailman who owns this mailbag.” He apparently was trying to deliver this letter to me. My Grandmother was the last to die. She was also a victim to this shady killer.
The officer radioed his partner and several other crews. They raced to the lumberyard and circled the grounds. The officer had a sketch and matched the shady killer to the sketch. He was handcuffed and brought to the station. Looking back on this all now, I am glad he is sitting in a dirty, creepy, effluvia jail cell for life with no chance of emancipation. The death penalty wouldn’t allow the malefactor to suffer enough! As for Sammy, she still barks at every mailman that crosses her path, but she has a sympathetic tone to her bark. As for me, I’m glad the case is solved and the harsh winds haven’t blown anymore bloody mailbags into the woods!
After she had deftly retrieved a soda can, Sammy had started becoming extremely active. She would wag her tail vigorously, and leave a bruise on me if her tail hit me. She ran circles around the house, and when I let her outside she would do the same thing. At first I thought she was breaking the soda cans and drinking them, thus getting caffeine in her system. I thought this until one day after circling the house she bolted into the woods in my backyard. She had done this before, and when I called her she usually came back, but this time she didn’t.
I chased her, or rather followed the sound of rustling leaves and broken twigs that I thought was her. I shouted continually in a guttural tone trying to subjugate her, “SAMMY COME! “ My poor neighbors had to listen to these screams, because the eddies were extremely harsh that day. Still, she didn’t come. I headed towards the woods. As I walked through the brush, I could see where her matted down trail meandered to make a labyrinth. Suddenly, I saw her behind an old oak tree. She was sniffing in a covert knot hole in the tree. As I peered around the tree, I saw what she was rubbing her nose against. It was tattered pieces of a mailman’s carrying bag. I pulled out what was left of the bag and shuddered.
The bag was covered with blood. Also in the bag was a letter addressed to me. I panicked and tried to scream, but nothing came out. I was in shock and a bit leery. I grabbed Samantha by the collar and forced her home, as I took the evidence with me. I immediately ran inside to call the cops. An officer on duty answered with a stern voice: “Officer Nuttelman, can I assist you?” I didn’t know what to say at first, I was thwarted. Then I answered, “Yes, I, I…I…found a ripped, blood soaked mailman’s bag in the woods behind my house.”
“Continue, with the story sir.”
“There’s also a letter addressed to me.”
“Did you open the letter sir?”
“Not yet, it’s stained with blood.”
“Don’t open it, we’ll send an officer over who’s trained with this type of case.”
“Ok, I’ll be waiting.”
I waited for what seemed like forever with Sammy at my side. She sensed my fear, as she was trembling with me. The trained officer finally arrived with rubber gloves, a chemical kit, and his normal police gear. He took the letter and opened it carefully. Inside was a letter that was dated 5 years ago before my grandmother had died. It read: Dear Grandson, I know you are an honorable person. I am writing to you to tell you about a shady character in town. He works in the lumberyard with Grandpa. He is known to steal and be violent. Rumor has it, he uses his ax for more than cutting down trees. Please be careful when you are out taking Sammy for her diurnal walks. Good tidings. Love, Grandma. P.S. Don’t tell anyone about this letter. I might be putting you in danger telling you all this.
The officer’s mouth hung open as he read this letter. The officer told that case was analogous to a case that occurred about 5 years ago. The date was the same day marked on the letter. The case involved an old man who was murdered with an identified sharp object near a lumber yard. The killer was never found. Apparently, the old man was on his way to the post office to get a stamp to mail a letter. I pondered this a minute and then said, “Oh my gosh, that was the letter we have here written by my grandmother.” The policeman then told me a mailman was also slain with an identified object around the same time. I thought out loud, “This must be the mailman who owns this mailbag.” He apparently was trying to deliver this letter to me. My Grandmother was the last to die. She was also a victim to this shady killer.
The officer radioed his partner and several other crews. They raced to the lumberyard and circled the grounds. The officer had a sketch and matched the shady killer to the sketch. He was handcuffed and brought to the station. Looking back on this all now, I am glad he is sitting in a dirty, creepy, effluvia jail cell for life with no chance of emancipation. The death penalty wouldn’t allow the malefactor to suffer enough! As for Sammy, she still barks at every mailman that crosses her path, but she has a sympathetic tone to her bark. As for me, I’m glad the case is solved and the harsh winds haven’t blown anymore bloody mailbags into the woods!
Thursday, December 11, 2008
"2nd Quarter Book Review"
The Lightning Thief by Rick Riordan. First Hyperion Paperbacks edition, 2006. Genre: Fantasy/mythology
Rick Riordan’s first novel of the Olympians series features a 12 year old, Percy Jackson. He is on a quest from the Greek gods, which include Zeus, Poseidon, Ares, etc. He is Poseidon’s son and has to find Zeus’ lightning bolt to stop, what Percy calls World War III. He has to fend off monsters (Medusa, the furies, etc.) And stop a war to save the world.
"One need not be an expert in Greek mythology to enjoy Percy’s journey. The narrator’s voice lends a refreshing air of realism to this riotously paced quest tale of heroism that questions the realities of our world, family, friendship and loyalty."-- Kirkus, starred review
This book reminds me of another book that I have read, called Fablehaven. Both of them are fantasy and have mythical creatures like centaurs and satyrs. In both stories the main characters have to save something. In The Lightning Thief, Percy has to save the world from a massive war. In Fablehaven, Kendra has to save the magical preserve from a witch and her demon. This also reminds me of The Contender, because both of the main characters need to work hard to reach their goal. Alfred’s is to become a contender, while Percy’s is to clear his father’s name.
“There he was, waiting for us, in his black leather duster and his sunglasses, an aluminum baseball bat propped on his shoulder. His motorcycle rumbled beside him, its headlight turning the sand red.” (321)
This book has made me a lot more interested in Greek mythology. It even got me to believe that he gods could in fact be living today. I like how Rick Riordan said that Geek gods could take the form of humans if they did not show there true form. He said a lot of believable things that told you that he had done a lot of research before writing the book. It even tells how mortals can’t see all of these things. There is a mist clouding their eyes and makes them see their own reality to strange events. I like the fact that Rick Riordan gives an answer to everything that you could ask about the book. Overall, Rick Riordan has become one of my favorite authors, because of this book. I hope to enjoy more of his books in the future.
Rick Riordan’s first novel of the Olympians series features a 12 year old, Percy Jackson. He is on a quest from the Greek gods, which include Zeus, Poseidon, Ares, etc. He is Poseidon’s son and has to find Zeus’ lightning bolt to stop, what Percy calls World War III. He has to fend off monsters (Medusa, the furies, etc.) And stop a war to save the world.
"One need not be an expert in Greek mythology to enjoy Percy’s journey. The narrator’s voice lends a refreshing air of realism to this riotously paced quest tale of heroism that questions the realities of our world, family, friendship and loyalty."-- Kirkus, starred review
This book reminds me of another book that I have read, called Fablehaven. Both of them are fantasy and have mythical creatures like centaurs and satyrs. In both stories the main characters have to save something. In The Lightning Thief, Percy has to save the world from a massive war. In Fablehaven, Kendra has to save the magical preserve from a witch and her demon. This also reminds me of The Contender, because both of the main characters need to work hard to reach their goal. Alfred’s is to become a contender, while Percy’s is to clear his father’s name.
“There he was, waiting for us, in his black leather duster and his sunglasses, an aluminum baseball bat propped on his shoulder. His motorcycle rumbled beside him, its headlight turning the sand red.” (321)
This book has made me a lot more interested in Greek mythology. It even got me to believe that he gods could in fact be living today. I like how Rick Riordan said that Geek gods could take the form of humans if they did not show there true form. He said a lot of believable things that told you that he had done a lot of research before writing the book. It even tells how mortals can’t see all of these things. There is a mist clouding their eyes and makes them see their own reality to strange events. I like the fact that Rick Riordan gives an answer to everything that you could ask about the book. Overall, Rick Riordan has become one of my favorite authors, because of this book. I hope to enjoy more of his books in the future.
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
"Book Review for 1st quarter"
William Vanderpoel
9-30-08
B
“Down the Rabbit Hole book review”
Down the Rabbit Hole, by Peter Abrahams. Harper Collins Publishers, 2005. Genre: Mystery (murder)
Down the Rabbit Hole is Peter Abrahams' first book in the Echo Falls series. The protagonist, Ingrid, lives in a town called Echo Falls. She has to find out who murdered a girl named Katie, before the police accuse her of the murder. She is only involved, because she left her bright red custom made soccer cleats at the crime scene.
“…juggles mystery with school life, avoids being noticed by clueless parents, gets into mortal danger, solves mystery, and explains it to police.”(Berman, 2005) The book cover says, “Ingrid realizes she must solve the murder on her own-before it’s too late!”
This book reminds me of A Wrinkle in Time, because in parts of Down the Rabbit Hole Chief Strade (chief of police) is searching for evidence in the woods that would help solve the murder. In A Wrinkle in Time the Murray’s are looking for the witches. Both stories use the woods as a symbol of wonder or hiding. This also reminds me of the book Tom Sawyer. Both of the main characters are sly, and are good at lying. Ingrid uses her skills to get out of trouble with the police, while Tom uses his skills to get people to do work for him.
“My friends, this may come as a surprise, but after our wonderful production of Dial M for Murder, I feel a sudden and very deep need to refresh myself. My plans take me far away, to Alaska or even beyond. I want honest physical work, space, a chance to work things out in my head.” (181-182)
I enjoy this author a lot even though this is the only book of his that I have read. I like how the author had a mysterious tone while writing, as you can see above. With this tone, the author gives you the feeling that each of the characters has their own mystery and this book is just telling about one of the characters mysteries. This tone also makes the book very suspenseful and makes you not want to put the book down. I also liked the characters diversity in their personality. For example, Grampy is a hot head who is determined not to sell his farm, while Ingrid’s mom is calm and compassionate, and wants Grampy to sell his farm.
9-30-08
B
“Down the Rabbit Hole book review”
Down the Rabbit Hole, by Peter Abrahams. Harper Collins Publishers, 2005. Genre: Mystery (murder)
Down the Rabbit Hole is Peter Abrahams' first book in the Echo Falls series. The protagonist, Ingrid, lives in a town called Echo Falls. She has to find out who murdered a girl named Katie, before the police accuse her of the murder. She is only involved, because she left her bright red custom made soccer cleats at the crime scene.
“…juggles mystery with school life, avoids being noticed by clueless parents, gets into mortal danger, solves mystery, and explains it to police.”(Berman, 2005) The book cover says, “Ingrid realizes she must solve the murder on her own-before it’s too late!”
This book reminds me of A Wrinkle in Time, because in parts of Down the Rabbit Hole Chief Strade (chief of police) is searching for evidence in the woods that would help solve the murder. In A Wrinkle in Time the Murray’s are looking for the witches. Both stories use the woods as a symbol of wonder or hiding. This also reminds me of the book Tom Sawyer. Both of the main characters are sly, and are good at lying. Ingrid uses her skills to get out of trouble with the police, while Tom uses his skills to get people to do work for him.
“My friends, this may come as a surprise, but after our wonderful production of Dial M for Murder, I feel a sudden and very deep need to refresh myself. My plans take me far away, to Alaska or even beyond. I want honest physical work, space, a chance to work things out in my head.” (181-182)
I enjoy this author a lot even though this is the only book of his that I have read. I like how the author had a mysterious tone while writing, as you can see above. With this tone, the author gives you the feeling that each of the characters has their own mystery and this book is just telling about one of the characters mysteries. This tone also makes the book very suspenseful and makes you not want to put the book down. I also liked the characters diversity in their personality. For example, Grampy is a hot head who is determined not to sell his farm, while Ingrid’s mom is calm and compassionate, and wants Grampy to sell his farm.
Monday, October 6, 2008
Simple Pleasures
In this world, there are many items of value to us, be it items with financial worth or moments that are dear to us. Back in the day, people couldn’t wait to have a family dinner or a camp out with dad. Now a day, it is more about the money. Has society corrupted our thoughts on what we, as people, think as important? Does this fast-paced world give us time for these priceless moments?
I wake up and realize that it is Sunday morning. This means game day over at grandmas. Almost every Sunday, my family and I go to my grandmas to watch football games, especially the New England Patriots, my all time favorite football team. The most important aspect of the game is my Patriots jersey.
This authentic sports gear, ranging anywhere from $50-$100, has four important pieces: The logo, the front, the sides, and the back of the jersey, each giving it a specific flare. This jersey is my lifeline during the games. It gives me protection from my superstitious grandma, who, if I don’t wear it, will blame me if the Patriots lose. Not wearing it is not an option!
The logo is a glimmering silver face with red, white, and blue hair, dangling off the head. Each of these colors representing one on the American flag. The face has a proud stern look, but feels like it’s mocking you in a sort of way. It gives you a feeling of hope or conquest, like when the Patriots crush the opposing team. This logo shows the true American spirit.
The front has two big numbers that seem to pop out at you, one and two. In smaller print, the word Patriots with a small logo is pasted over the “P” right below the neck collar. A meshed material all over the shirt, lets your skin breath. Football games at Grandma’s get heated, and this cooling off mesh comes in handy. To top it all off, a National Football League patch is plopped down in the bottom right hand corner.
Both shoulders are identical in style. There is a bold silver stripe right where your shoulder ends and bicep begins. The Reebok Symbol is making an X-shape, no more than an inch below the stripe. Finally, the Patriot logo floats mysteriously under the Reebok symbol. These all give you the signal to beware.
In the back sits the numbers one and two, which are slightly smaller than the numbers on the front. Just like the front, they are outlined in a red line and then a silver line, filled with white coloring. Above the numbers are five letters in bold, white letters that spell B-R-A-D-Y. These letters shout the name out and make you want say BR-A-DY, and Sunday afternoons over at Grandmas are perfect for that.
I look into my window and see an orange glow coming from the inside. I think for a moment, and then realize, it’s a fire, yes. After a long day of sledding, this will be perfect. I approach the front door, cold and wet from sledding. Yet, I know the fire inside will warm me. I open the door and peel off the wet clothes slowly, as my fingers are still frozen. At last, the winter clothes are off, and I feel like I’m finally thawing.
From the kitchen I smell hot cocoa my mom has made. I know it’s my favorite, because I can smell the hint of mint. I pour myself a big mug of this chocolate heaven and begin to overfill it with mini marshmallows. As I touch the mug, my once numb fingers begin to tingle with warmth. Now it’s time to warm my body.
I hear noise from the living room. “Crackle, Crackle, Tsssssss!” The noise lures me into the living room. My sister is already sitting down, her eyes mesmerized by the flame. My dog, Ginger, has found this spot a comfortable place too. I nestle up next to her, still holding my cocoa in one hand. Perfect, I think to myself. What a great way to relax and calm my body. I hear my dog breath, and my breathing copies hers.
Dad joins the room and sets up the Monopoly game. As we slowly get up from the fire, we start a family game. I’m the silver hat on my way to buying property. Although I’m not directly in front of the fire now, it is still within my sight and takes me away from the game at times. This warm fire, inexpensive, yet the mood with family around is priceless.
My Patriots jersey and a crackling fire at home provide me with special family moments, relaxation, and time away from my normal routine. My Patriots jersey and all its special details get me revved up, and prepared for the Sunday game. Sitting by my fireplace with a warm fire glowing, gives me time to think and allows me to step away from reality for a brief moment.
My Patriots jersey is more of a tool for being safe with grandma, while the crackling fire is a moment that provides me with a blank mind and relaxation. The jersey is a symbol of pride, while the fire is a symbol of neutrality. They are both used at different times, the jersey is mainly used in the afternoon, while the fire is mainly used at night.
I prefer priceless moments to items of financial worth. No matter what, I know that the items of financial worth are just tools for a particular ocassion. They cannot give me the satisfaction or pleasure that priceless moments give you. Society hasn’t gotten the best of me yet, I still cherish these special moments!
I wake up and realize that it is Sunday morning. This means game day over at grandmas. Almost every Sunday, my family and I go to my grandmas to watch football games, especially the New England Patriots, my all time favorite football team. The most important aspect of the game is my Patriots jersey.
This authentic sports gear, ranging anywhere from $50-$100, has four important pieces: The logo, the front, the sides, and the back of the jersey, each giving it a specific flare. This jersey is my lifeline during the games. It gives me protection from my superstitious grandma, who, if I don’t wear it, will blame me if the Patriots lose. Not wearing it is not an option!
The logo is a glimmering silver face with red, white, and blue hair, dangling off the head. Each of these colors representing one on the American flag. The face has a proud stern look, but feels like it’s mocking you in a sort of way. It gives you a feeling of hope or conquest, like when the Patriots crush the opposing team. This logo shows the true American spirit.
The front has two big numbers that seem to pop out at you, one and two. In smaller print, the word Patriots with a small logo is pasted over the “P” right below the neck collar. A meshed material all over the shirt, lets your skin breath. Football games at Grandma’s get heated, and this cooling off mesh comes in handy. To top it all off, a National Football League patch is plopped down in the bottom right hand corner.
Both shoulders are identical in style. There is a bold silver stripe right where your shoulder ends and bicep begins. The Reebok Symbol is making an X-shape, no more than an inch below the stripe. Finally, the Patriot logo floats mysteriously under the Reebok symbol. These all give you the signal to beware.
In the back sits the numbers one and two, which are slightly smaller than the numbers on the front. Just like the front, they are outlined in a red line and then a silver line, filled with white coloring. Above the numbers are five letters in bold, white letters that spell B-R-A-D-Y. These letters shout the name out and make you want say BR-A-DY, and Sunday afternoons over at Grandmas are perfect for that.
I look into my window and see an orange glow coming from the inside. I think for a moment, and then realize, it’s a fire, yes. After a long day of sledding, this will be perfect. I approach the front door, cold and wet from sledding. Yet, I know the fire inside will warm me. I open the door and peel off the wet clothes slowly, as my fingers are still frozen. At last, the winter clothes are off, and I feel like I’m finally thawing.
From the kitchen I smell hot cocoa my mom has made. I know it’s my favorite, because I can smell the hint of mint. I pour myself a big mug of this chocolate heaven and begin to overfill it with mini marshmallows. As I touch the mug, my once numb fingers begin to tingle with warmth. Now it’s time to warm my body.
I hear noise from the living room. “Crackle, Crackle, Tsssssss!” The noise lures me into the living room. My sister is already sitting down, her eyes mesmerized by the flame. My dog, Ginger, has found this spot a comfortable place too. I nestle up next to her, still holding my cocoa in one hand. Perfect, I think to myself. What a great way to relax and calm my body. I hear my dog breath, and my breathing copies hers.
Dad joins the room and sets up the Monopoly game. As we slowly get up from the fire, we start a family game. I’m the silver hat on my way to buying property. Although I’m not directly in front of the fire now, it is still within my sight and takes me away from the game at times. This warm fire, inexpensive, yet the mood with family around is priceless.
My Patriots jersey and a crackling fire at home provide me with special family moments, relaxation, and time away from my normal routine. My Patriots jersey and all its special details get me revved up, and prepared for the Sunday game. Sitting by my fireplace with a warm fire glowing, gives me time to think and allows me to step away from reality for a brief moment.
My Patriots jersey is more of a tool for being safe with grandma, while the crackling fire is a moment that provides me with a blank mind and relaxation. The jersey is a symbol of pride, while the fire is a symbol of neutrality. They are both used at different times, the jersey is mainly used in the afternoon, while the fire is mainly used at night.
I prefer priceless moments to items of financial worth. No matter what, I know that the items of financial worth are just tools for a particular ocassion. They cannot give me the satisfaction or pleasure that priceless moments give you. Society hasn’t gotten the best of me yet, I still cherish these special moments!
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